


doll parts

by alovelyvixen



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: JohnJae - Freeform, Light Angst, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Plot Twists, doll au, i really dont know how to tag this omfg, just trust me i think this is good
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-07
Updated: 2020-03-21
Packaged: 2021-02-25 21:13:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,971
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21702004
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alovelyvixen/pseuds/alovelyvixen
Summary: dolls are all around; they walk amongst the people, and are treated as inferior. jaehyun is one of these living dolls, who secretly dreams of experiencing the world and feeling as he cycles through his daily routine. love is the only thing that can give him the key to the world - but for a doll, that is rare. someone must love him, as he is not intended to experience feelings of infatuation. jaehyun doesn't want to love someone - he wants to know what the world feels like when you are loved.
Relationships: Jung Yoonoh | Jaehyun/Suh Youngho | Johnny
Comments: 5
Kudos: 47





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> thank you so much to haesuns (@haesunns on twitter) for continuously beta reading this for me because i have never seen this idea and neither has she but i still luv her the most go read her works :)) (i was recently made aware, though, that user woobot (lu_woo) has written a doll au! theirs is very different, however, and i started writing mine months ago. we're cool, though, we're friends :) you should go read theirs too theyre such a good writer)

Jaehyun dreamily leaned back in on his stand for what seemed like the millionth time this hour. It made his back stiff from standing in one position, even doing as much as throwing off his balance, but the day had just begun; The day here, that is. 9am, yet he had been here since 7am, getting prepped and ready for customers. He wasn’t the only one that came, since the display dolls all had to come. Even so, where was he to go? His job before that made it impossible to rest. On a Friday morning like this, he knew there was a long day ahead of him. The store only stayed open while the sun was up, and then he had an evening job to attend, and then a night job to attend.

Out of his three occupations, this wasn’t too demeaning to his person. His being, more so. First, he was to arrive at 7am to dress; An outfit amongst the many others, this with his tag on it, awaited him to put on, with a pair of shoes underneath, the entire ensemble depending on what he was advertising for the day. After that, he was swarmed with staff applying accessories, powdering his face to replicate normal makeup. Two hours later, he was transformed into an only - to - be - seen display doll.

As nice and neutral as the job seemed, let there be no mistake; He had no status. Though the store depended on his wonderful looks for sales, that’s all he was good for. That’s all dolls were good for, really, and every single doll on display knew that better than anyone, being fed that speech every single day before they were set up.

He slowly, effortlessly moved his head around as if he were in front of a camera, a technique he had rehearsed a million times. Many male, and female foreigners, stared at him as he stood and watched customers go by. Overall, he could feel a basic set of emotions; Happy and sad. The more rare ones such as anger and yearning were fleeting. These strangers’ tempting stares and gestures did nothing to affect him.

Jaehyun averted his gaze away from a couple of women that were particularly fond of his facial features. He assumed that it was because he was more Western-looking than the rest of the dolls.

His creator, manufacturer, whatever you could call it, had made him as an experiment with high hopes in mind. The reason that not many models looked like him were his dimples. Too big of a smile would create deep, odd ridges on each side of his face that would make those interested in a doll would turn away. His only flaw, that was so large and obvious, yet so easily concealed.

“He’s so handsome!” One of them pointed at him. “Wow~ Look at his jaw! He’s so gorgeous.” Jaehyun had tilted his head to the side. Flattery had no effect on him, since it all normally came to him when he was being used for cosmetic purposes. Never when he walked on the street did someone compliment him, nor did they ever do so on his talents.

Once they had left, he noticed that one of the female associates was scurrying around, mumbling to herself about something. The majority of the workers were human, so they often succumbed to the charms of the patrons. She was most likely running to do something for a customer. It was a frequent occurrence.

The tall, busty employee made a sharp turn around his display and nearly tipped his stand over entirely. It was secured around his waist, so he had to save himself by shooting out his leg and pushing himself back upright. This made his knee that he was complaining about twist. The hinge felt looser than ever, which meant he would have to take a trip down to the Quick Fix station at the store. For now, there were a few more hours of work, and he had to power through.

`

The hours passed, and he was relieved when he saw the sunset pour through the windows of the store’s upper floor. He struggled to get out of his outfit, what with his knee twisting about when he relaxed it. Jaehyun examined the hinge through his thick silicon skin, toying with the screw that had gotten bent. It was just the screw, which meant he didn’t need to get a whole new leg. What a relief.

He dragged himself over to the store, and propped himself up in one of the high stools as he waited to be fixed. Doctors - he considered them doctors, but the general public referred to them as repairmen - here were different nearly every day.

“Hello, have you been to this location before?” An assistant peeked their head from the back.

“Jung Jaehyun,” He nodded, sighing. Unfortunately, he was here at least every other week. With his lack of production value came the lack of effort in his function.

“Oh, Jaehyun. I can fix you right now. Doctors are busy attaching new parts,” The assistant smiled. “I’m Renjun, by the way. I hear you all the time, but I just paint the parts in the back. Sometimes - and you didn’t hear this from me - dolls come in here and I paint them. It’s pretty nice.” He grabbed the box of tools from off the desk and kneeled in front of him.

“You must be very talented,” Jaehyun shivered while he applied numbing cream to the crease of his knee.

“Yup, these,” Renjun held his foot up to showcase his shoe, “I painted myself.”

“Wow... Those look nice,” The colors were quite beautiful. If he wasn’t a doll, he would be an interior designer, or a fashion designer. His niche for colors and patterns did him well. He swallowed watching him take a scalpel and slowly pierce and create a gap in his skin. Jaehyun held his breath at the odd, nauseating sensation. Dolls couldn’t eat, but he felt extremely nauseous at Renjun’s hands basically poking and removing his bones.

To break down doll anatomy, it was simple: it started with the mechanical bone, then the soft plastic shell of a muscle, then the thick layer of silicon skin. Jaehyun sat there, paralyzed in a sense, thinking about whether or not he would make it to his evening job on time.

“You’re almost done, you can wake up,” Renjun pat his other leg after a while, chuckling. The joke was that dolls didn’t sleep, or they at least didn’t need it. That’s why Jaehyun could run all twenty four hours of the day without struggle.

The doll watched him use the tiny torch against his skin, sealing it up. Watching his own skin melt together was odd, since that was not the case with humans. “Thank you, Renjun,” He stood up on his leg and nodded. The normal hinge repair was $50, so he pulled out his tips for the day and handed them to him. “I think there is.. $20 extra there. Keep it, you’re very nice.”

“It’s only human of me,” The young nurse nodded.

`

Jaehyun sat backstage at his next job, practicing in the mirror. His glassy eyes stared back at him as he effortlessly followed the melody of the song he was singing. As the lounge’s singer, he sang in re to that of a beautiful siren relaying a hauntingly gorgeous song. It was a talent that all dolls had, but rarely any pursued as an area of work. So many humans aimed to be in his position and worked hard for it, but he merely saw it as a way of income. This was where he had to get out of there quick before any jealous spectators had a chance to take him apart.

His silky blue shirt loosely laid against his skin, glittering under the muted lights of the vanity. He’d forgotten his normal dress slacks at home, so he was stuck in the black jeans he had been pulling on and off for the day.

A dancer poked one of the hinges of his shoulder as a signal for him to join them on stage. Jaehyun followed along, eventually passing them up to take his place, center stage. The track started, and the dancer who had tapped him circled around his waist. He made no emotion towards her touch, instead focusing on his frightening song.

She eventually made her way out into the crowd. A few others were out there, tempting the men of the audience, and sometimes a few gazing women. They stripped off accessories slowly to tempt their stares and make Jaehyun’s wonderful singing become white noise for their lust. While he sang, he felt a sadness, watching the women be admired and wanted by the men. Only on the stage did he allow himself to feel any sense of yearning and want for a human being.

`

After the show, he pushed his clothes into his assigned lockbox and rushed out. Even if he walked at a normal pace, he would be able to make it on time, as he constantly wished to do.

“Excuse me! Sir!” A shout amongst the many people walking out of the lounge prevailed, but alas, Jaehyun kept running. He made it out of the immediate crowd trying to get to their cars and resorted to simply speed walking. This last job was the most shameful one he would ever have, even if it wasn’t the worst it could get.

“Sir!” Jaehyun looked left and right before he leaped into the crosswalk.

“Hey, you!”

He winced and felt his arm tense up from the sudden yank it was given. Panic spread through him once he realized that the person was yelling for him, and had now gotten angry. “I’m so sorry, I wasn’t sure who you were talking to, people usually never talk to me. It wasn’t my intention to make you upset.”

“A pretty doll like you,” The man held his chin firmly. “I doubt people skip the chance on talking to.”

Jaehyun simply shifted his gaze down, shifting his weight backwards. “I usually am at work. Speaking of work, I have to go work another shift.” Right now, getting a man too interested in him would only go downhill.

“I positively couldn’t take my eyes off of you, singing up there,” He continued to try and sway him. As apart of the stigma that dolls were given, nobody really knew that they rarely felt any emotion. Jaehyun was expecting the normal demanding, seductive act to try and lure him home with them. People were such perverts towards dolls.

Whilst he was thinking of what he could retaliate back with nicely, another man came up to them. Was this a ring? Was he about to get kidnapped and remodeled and resold? He looked over at the man that had approached him, directly.

“We have to hurry, come on,” There was an urgent look in his eyes. Jaehyun tried his best to read it, but it only made him panic more at the thought of his life being absolutely ruined. “Excuse me, we have to leave,” He rested a hand on the shoulder of the man holding his chin. “Please let him go.”

“I’ll come back and see you again, doll, don’t worry.”

As soon as the other man was out of his sight, he didn’t waste a second making his escape from the second one.

“Wait! Please!” He was tall, and had longer legs than him; His running did virtually nothing. Jaehyun gasped and turned around; Fear, even that was a more frequent emotion than happiness.

“Are you headed home?” This tall, considerably good looking stranger inquired.

Jaehyun thought he looked quite a bit familiar, but he didn’t dwell on it too much. Was he to lie, or to tell the truth?

Before he could think  _ this _ too much, he was given more context. “I figured I could drive you, since it seems pretty dangerous to be here. I really liked your performance, and I would like it if I would be able to come back and see you the next time I swing around.” Upon the conversation becoming official, he realized that he was considerably out of breath. Was he running after him, too?

“Thank you very much,” He offered him a small smile, as per usual. “I should let you know, I’m a doll. You seem very polite, and I wouldn’t want to let you down.”

“There are a fair few dolls in my life, it’s no bother.” The street was starting to empty.

“Um,” Jaehyun didn’t want one of his respected lounge patrons to see him at such a low point compared to his wonderful, respected position here, but he liked the gentlemanly attention he was receiving. “I really appreciate the gesture..”

“I think it would be good, I really do. Tonight’s pretty dangerous, since a lot of people were drinking.”

People were always drinking, that was nothing new. This man was looking out for him. Jaehyun couldn’t say this happened every day, nor could he say that he enjoyed it. “Would it ease your mind if I said that sometimes I took a taxi?”

“I want to be the one to chauffeur you home, tonight,” He pressed his lips together into a smile. “I’m Johnny Seo. My apologies for not introducing myself after saving you from a stranger.”

“It’s nice to meet you, Mr. Seo. But um- What if my place is too far-”

“My night is free. I’ve no obligations for the night, except perhaps drive you home.”

Jaehyun took in a worthless breath and bit his lip. “Well, I have another job to get to, to be honest with you. A - Another lounge gig, that is,” He lied. This man seemed far too sweet and gentlemanly to for him to reveal that he was a cage dancer at a nightclub.

“I can be your taxi there, and then I’ll leave you be. I cannot stress that enough. I want to respect a beautiful doll’s boundaries. It’s late, personally speaking,” Johnny motioned him over to the parking lot. “Your fare is simply conversation with me.”

He nodded, full of regret. If he had veins, it would be coursing through them. How dumb was he that he had succumbed to pressure (if you could call it that) and was getting in a car with a stranger, all because he was sweet and charming? “I’m going to the lounge near the nightclub, the Kitten’s Cradle.” The most cliché name for a club he could have possibly applied for. That name alone was enough incentive for him to keep it a secret.

“Fancy. High class people up there, aside from the club.” Johnny nodded while the two of them climbed into his car, and he started off almost immediately. At least his request to rush was taken well. “Is lounge singing your passion?”   


  
Jaehyun nodded. It was only a fifteen minute speed walk, so he could only imagine that the drive would be less than half that time. The lounge he was referring to was a few places over from the nightclub, and would only add about three minutes back onto that time.

“I can see why. Do you have a name?”

“Yes. Jaehyun.” With these strangers, it was best to give as little personal information as possible. The last thing you wanted was a stalker, or a potential stalker who was insistent.

“Very nice to meet you, Jaehyun.” Johnny’s gaze lingered on his emotionless, beautiful face for a few moments before snapping back onto the road.

`

Friday couldn’t have come faster for him, even if he did have one more shift left. Preceding his broken knee joint, his body had already been feeling sore. It needed a rest from movement, and maybe some relaxing exercises to ease up his hinges. Dolls got physically exhausted, too, just in a different way. Sleeping was glorious rest, even if it wasn’t needed. The weekends were the only reason that he didn’t go absolutely crazy.

“We’re here,” Johnny tapped his shoulder. “Good luck in there. I’ll see you back at the other lounge... Maybe next Friday?”

“I’m there all week. There are other performances during the day, though, if you are interested in lounge singers altogether,” Jaehyun turned on his sales personality. “Whenever you’re off, there are singers.” He stepped out of the car and held his hands behind his back.

“I’m just there to see you. I’m blown away by your talent. I’ll try and come by again,” Johnny awkwardly idled. “See you around.”

Jaehyun backed away and closed the door. He was clearly waiting for him to go inside, and he couldn’t - he wasn’t a performer. It took a few seconds for Johnny to realize that his idling would do nothing before driving off. Once he was at least 500 feet away, he made a run for the nightclub.

Inside, the night had already begun. The time on the wall inside the dressing room indicated that he was a few minutes late despite being driven. Damn it, if only he wasn’t so vulnerable and easily persuaded. “Sorry I’m late!” He dropped his pass into the bucket at the counter and hurried to the back to get ready. Everyone was already out, and it was empty, which made tonight that much more depressing.

Getting ready consisted of making sure that his hair was in place, pulling off all his clothes, and pulling on a pair of boxers with a built in bulge - because, you know... Doll anatomy. It was one of his biggest insecurities, and he hated it. He hated that this was the job that brought in the most income, too. The one that paid his bills and left so much extra money to stash in his savings account.

He clamored up into his empty cage and feigned happiness and lust as he began working up an audience. Humans craved attention, which explained why most of the floor and pole dancers were human. Being a natural spectacle, it was dreadful thinking back on it later. This job only emphasized that he was only created with the intention of being someone’s eye candy, or plaything.

As a doll, he was pretty much cut out for this job. So many of his fellow cage dancers were dolls, too. Sicheng, whomst he considered a friend, was on the far side of the club. In his words, sometimes they would get ‘lucky’ and attract someone who would pay for a ‘private dance’, which meant he seduced them and made them drool for some period of time. Why? Who knows. ‘Humans are dumb and greedy, they’ll take anything they can get,’ Sicheng had scoffed, counting some money that he had taken off of a stranger they had just gotten done with. He was a fully functioning doll that was extremely capable, but his make wasn’t too popular. More popular than Jaehyun’s, though.

It was an hour after hour of sitting in his cage, dancing, before he was able to go home. The lights disoriented him, which made him call an actual cab this time. Why hadn’t he dwelled there, or thought about it? That ridiculous cat’s cradle was nothing but a high paying, sleazy give in to him.

On the fifteen minute ride home, he couldn’t help but think about the fact that there were nice strangers out there. Johnny Seo was a great example of someone who wanted dolls to thrive (as far as he knew). Normally he wouldn’t remember names, but he did remember his. Those who approached him just as gently as he would approach others were worth remembering. Even when he stumbled up into his small little 2 - room studio apartment, he thought about how nice Johnny was. There was that feeling of yearning again.

The reality of someone being polite to him, an occurrence that only took place once in a blue moon, was flooring him. Jaehyun was being carried by happiness while he cleaned up to go to bed.

His laptop lay on the end of his bed, clean and boring. He would always throw on whatever music was in the mainstream so that he wasn’t left in the void of his own thoughts while he fell asleep.

Jaehyun climbed under his covers, already loving the relaxation that his waterbed was providing. He wasn’t one to invest in himself on an expensive level, but this was certainly worth it. A song came on, and he quite liked it. The lyrics were sweeter than most songs he listened to; Coming from him, that was something. Before he could fall asleep, he leaned over to see what song was playing.

‘ _ DPR Live - Jasmine. _ ’ What a wonderful song. The doll curled back up in his covers and closed his eyes, letting the song drown out any indicators of the world he lived in.

۵


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> doll's day off.

After a night of meeting someone new, he was happy that he had the day off. He rarely had days off; In fact, they only came every other Saturday. Jaehyun sat up in his bed and pushed open the curtain, hanging it on the hook. Sleep was not necessary, and he technically couldn’t, but he liked disassociating from the world for up to 9 hours as his own personal form of rest.

Jaehyun held the window sill with his fingertips, observing the roots of his plants. They were his pride and joy, as he found that he had a bright green thumb after bringing a dying succulent back to life. There were three or four on the sill that he liked to keep an eye on, but there were many scattered around the place.

His place was not a house, but could hardly be called an apartment. At 800 square feet, it was big enough for him to inhabit. When you walked in, there was the living room, with the bathroom and kitchen next up, and a hallway that lead to his bedroom.

Of course, the kitchen and bathroom got little to no use, unless he needed to wash off after getting dirty. He went straight for the living room, the second biggest room in the place. His desk was in there, as well as a normal living room setup. Jaehyun perked up and turned around when he realized that he hadn’t grabbed the watering can from the kitchen. Once he had that, he started watering them all.

“Alexa, play my music.”

_ You got it _ . She started playing his normal music, and currently that was “Circle” By Saay. His style of music was fairly predictable, which was slow and easy on the ears. It was especially good when it made his non existent heart feel something.

When he was done with his plants, he sat down at his desk. In the span of a day, he could finish a few movies, and maybe browse a few shows. The TV on the wall was supposed to be for guests, but it was more obvious to say that it never got any use. Not even Winwin would come over, because apparently he lived in the opposite direction of the club.

Jaehyun brought up his Hulu account in favor of watching food shows. Since he wasn’t able to eat, it was nice watching food shows and seeing what they thought the food tasted like and hearing their descriptions. It broadcasted to the TV, and while that loaded and began, he pulled out his box of sewing materials and projects. One of his favourite hobbies was making clothes completely from scratch, whether it be a jacket or a shirt or even underwear. Nobody ever complimented him on them when they were done, but he felt accomplished.

Currently, he was working on a denim jacket. It was one that was left at the club by some teenager that had snuck in, and was kicked out. Thankfully, nothing important was left in the pockets, so he could keep it. It was big, and wouldn’t fit him perfectly, but was still a jacket. He’d been working on it for the longest time, adding little things here and there. Jackets were a key accessory to an outfit.

He continued to embroider a design on the pocket while he watched TV. Time flew by more than he knew, and it was afternoon by the time he was done with the pocket, as well as the pockets on the side. Jaehyun opened the dark curtains of the window that led to the outside, and left the sheer piece in front for a bit of privacy.

In this neighborhood, there were mostly similar buildings. All of them were either filled with more dolls or with people who couldn’t afford a better place. Realistically, this place didn’t cost a lot, even if he was on the third floor, and he had money that, if they knew he had, people would stumble to be his other half for. Sure, he had a lot of money, but he didn’t need anything more than this. If he wanted something, he could get it. It was an ideal lifestyle.

Most days, he focused on his clothing creations, but it varied. Sometimes he would go to the store, or go to the park, or whatever he was feeling up to. Since he was feeling more exhausted than normal, he started to stretch out his hinges before he went. People needed to exercise to stay limber, and he thought of himself like the Tinman - minus the oil. In order to stay mobile, he had to move to make sure he didn’t get rusty. His body would get tight if he didn’t ‘work out’, per say.

Being a doll with joints meant he was, technically, limber, so he was able to bend in all shapes. It was no wonder that some dolls actually went into sex work, because humans were monsters who fanticized about things that the human body can’t do. On days he went out, it was with his doll exterior disguised.

`

Jaehyun stood in front of the bathroom mirror. His tools and makeup were splayed out across the bathroom, and he sighed. Going out meant that he had to look more human - at least, if he didn’t want to attract any unwanted attention. His doll joints were hidden under his skin and only poked through his skin like normal bones did.

First, he started with the texture on his face. It took having to go down to Renjun’s workshop to fix it - which is why he was surprised he never saw him earlier - but he would basically lightly brand his skin to add tiny pores and pimples and moles in random places. Sure, people had ‘porcelain skin’, but even they had tiny perfections. It stung, but the pain felt like little pinches the more he did it. Some hair grease would make his skin look oily.

His hair was next, which he just had to tease and put oil in until it looked like he had just woken up and put little to no effort in. That was the extent of it all, since he wasn’t manufactured to look perfect, and his eyes passed as okay as long as nobody looked too close and realized they were not held in place by a  _ caruncle, _ the tiny skin flaps that kept eyes in place, or that they were perfectly symmetrical. Ironically, he knew the human body just as well as he knew his own. One day, he wished to have one, so he needed to study just in case.

There were some people who thought he was a human, which he felt proud of, but got scared that they would form a connection, and he would have to tell them he was a doll. Today, he was going to the craft store to look for embellishments. He was feeling rebellious, and a little bored, so maybe he would find something to spice up his look, as well as look for embellishments for his clothing pieces. His main mode of transportation to the little marketplace was a skateboard, since it was only a few blocks away.

“Jaehyun!”

He stopped the skateboard about halfway through his trek, in the middle of the people’s marketplace that lie just before the corporate one. “Oh, hey, Jisung.”

“I found some stones that I think you would like, and some pots for your plants.” Jisung ran across the street. “These ones are for growth, which I think would be good, and these ones are for happiness. I know that I give you those all the time, but they’re good for you, and you can never have enough. The pots are like… Bamboo. We got too many extras, and I kill everything I touch.”

“Thanks.” Jaehyun smiled softly and nodded, grabbing them from him. Jisung’s family ran one of the stores in the people’s market, and they met when he had first moved in and was looking for decorations. He had him to blame for the whole plant obsession. Jisung knew that he was a doll, after he saw him in the window of the store he worked in. He was just a child, so there was no harm in him knowing. It didn’t bother either of them, so he could consider him a friend. “I’m going to the craft store, so I’ll talk to you later, when I come by.”

“Okay,” His voice was quiet, as per usual. “Make sure to come back this way on your way back. My mom is staying open for an hour or two later for a, uh, special, I think.”

“Sounds good.” Jaehyun held the pot filled with stones in his hands and pushed off his skateboard so that he could continue his trip.

At the craft store, he was well known as the ‘young regular who liked fashion’. As much as he was a social pariah and was insecure, he made some sort of status for himself, whether it be with Renjun, at the club with Winwin, or with Jisung - and, partially, his family. ‘ _ Hyun, we have a box you can dig through, if you want’ _ , they would tell him, usually after they got a new shipment. It wasn’t a corporation owned store, so they weren’t stingy about giving away outlier tier things.

“Hey, Hyun, no new shipments this week. Sorry.”

“It’s okay, thanks Seulgi.”

He went straight to the section that was filled with chains, buttons, and the like. The chains looked really appealing. Maybe he could find a set and make a cuff earring. Jaehyun went over to the kits and pulled all of them forward, so that he could get the most untouched kit from the back.

“Ah!” He jumped and shoved all of them forward.

“Hey, did I scare you?”

“I was not expecting to see any familiar faces today, or ever.”

“Well,” He made Jaehyun jump again, as he was suddenly approaching him from the right. “You know the owner.”

“I come here a lot.”

“So you just weren’t expecting me? Relax, Jaehyun, I’m playing with you,” Johnny smiled.

“I’m just stopping by to get some stuff, so I wasn’t. I’m not used to seeing you around here, especially since the lounge is so far away.” He wished he could feel the human emotion of embarrassment rather than awkwardly stand here, doing nothing.

“I don’t work or live near the lounge, I’m not rich.” He was right, since it was in the middle of all recreation and big stores. It was the life of the city. “What are you doing looking in this section?”

“I make clothes, and I was looking for some accessories,” Jaehyun looked in his hands. “What are you doing with those?”

“Oh, don’t think I’m concocting someone of my own. I mean, I kind of am, but I have a license.” Johnny was holding what were his own hinges, and a tub of his inner layer of skin. “They’re for a friend. I’m his assistant, so don’t get me wrong.”

“No wonder you’re so nice to dolls.”

“Ouch. Don’t make it sound so mean.”

For someone like Jisung, for example, it was different for him to like dolls, especially since he was an impressionable young spirit. Johnny was around them, and his friend was, too, so it was just standard that he was nice to him. It was like making a teacher hang out with a child during the school day.

“If you’re looking for some extra cash, I can ask my friend if he wants a direct maker for some clothes. He buys them from the stores, so they’re more expensive. I know you make a fair amount at the lounge, but it could bring in some extra money.”

“I don’t need money, I’m okay.” Jaehyun felt bad denying him. “But… I can just give them to you.”

“I would never put your hard work to waste like that. That would make me a bad person. Just let me know when you have some done- You have a phone, right?”

“I don’t. I just don’t have one. I’m not owned by anyone.” He looked down. Shame was the worst feeling of all that he was able to feel. The fact that he didn’t have one was because he didn’t need to communicate with anyone, on top of his need to say he wasn’t owned by anyone made him feel awful.

“Do you have an e-mail?”

“I do.”

“I will contact you through your e-mail, then. Strictly business. I won’t make you feel endangered.” Johnny pulled his phone out and tapped a few times, before handing it to him.

When he was first shoved out onto the streets, he wanted a phone more than anything. Everyone was on them, and used them to talk. A phone had a status to it that he wanted the second he was rejected. Even up until he got his place, he wanted one. It wasn’t until his money started piling up that he realized a phone would be useless to him. As a doll, a phone would be nothing but a cosmetic add - on. He held it flat in one hand, since he couldn’t quite grasp it the way Johnny had, and type in his e-mail. “Here. I’ll try my best to respond, but I’m hardly ever home, and I only have every other Saturday off.”

Johnny furrowed his eyebrows. “You’re busy. I bet all the lounges have you booked up to the ceiling.”

“Oh, yeah, they do.” Jaehyun couldn’t identify why he was having a hard time speaking today. Dumb doll. “I try my best to go all around.” He had almost revealed that he had other jobs, all through him revealing his schedule.

“No rush. Make the clothes at your own speed, okay?” Johnny smiled at him. “I’ve got everything I need, so I’ll let you keep browsing.” There was a kind of glow on him, like finding an independent clothes supplier was the greatest thing ever.

“Okay,” He looked down. It felt odd, as if he was inferior to everyone, even if it was someone who was around dolls and tolerated them. “Have a good day, Johnny.”

  
“Have a good week, Jaehyun. I’ll see you sometime next week.”

Jaehyun stayed where he was, still, feeling like he had just been called out. Why did he want to go home? Why did he feel like he should never check his e-mail again? He hated this feeling, mostly because of the fact that he didn’t know what it was. Fear? If he could compare them with human feelings, he would, but he couldn’t. He didn’t have a heart, or veins, or any type of active nervous system. It didn’t matter at the end of the day.

۵

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello !! this is one of my more infrequent fics so thank u for still sticking around w my niche idea. 
> 
> i hope all of you are staying safe and INSIDE right now, so that none of you get sick and normal life can resume as soon as possible. it is also extremely important to stay well informed, since there are many rumors and so much misleading information going around. you all are so sweet, and for those of you that have to work, i am hoping that you will be okay. i wish the best for all of you :)

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! I'm Marcie! If you want to follow me / talk to me / stalk me / roleplay (i rp bts and nct pls rp with me lmao) my twitter is [here](https://twitter.com/froggiebubu) , my curiouscat (to leave me feedback and suggestions) is [here](https://curiouscat.me/femmeyong) , and my kakaotalk is marciexbam! :)
> 
> Enjoy my works! x


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